Damage Control

My brother, Harold, is always breaking my stuff. It’s been like this since the day I was born, when he ruined by crib mattress by nicking off with it and using it to slide down a hill on our property (quite an innovative move for a five year-old, I must say). When I was seven, he broke my favourite doll in the process of investigating whether it could withstand my grandpa’s bench vice. He later went on to write off not one, but two, of my cars. Classic.

This weekend, Harold came to stay at my place, and for some reason thought that he could park his motorbike in the house. First of all… what? Why? The notion seems bizarre to me. Second of all, his bike is way too big to fit comfortably through my door, with the result being that the door-frame now has a significant bend in it, and the door won’t close properly.

He didn’t seem too concerned, funnily enough, until I dropped my cost estimate for aluminium door replacement. Melbourne has an interesting history when it comes to architecture so my home has a lot to live up to. Friends, let me in on your recommendations, please – I actually just made up the number that I told Harold, and I might have embellished my guesstimate a little. I think it’s totally justified… I mean, obviously he should pay for the door, but what about the inconvenience he’s causing me? 

Anyway, if I have overestimated the cost, I can use the excess to fix the upstairs bathroom window, which has had a crack in it since Harold’s last visit. What he was doing in there is beyond me. What’s the going cost to install replacement windows, Melbourne is in the middle of a house renovation frenzy so I’m sure it’ll be easy to get a quote. Now that I think about it, I should probably invoice Harold for a fair bit extra, knowing how likely it is that he’ll cause more damage to my stuff in the future.

The most annoying thing is that he’s essentially never malicious about it, so I feel a bit bad asking him to take responsibility. Someone’s gotta do it, though.

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