Cleaning the Sewers

Cleaning all of Melbourne’s sewers was a lot harder than I thought it would be. In theory, it should have been easy. I used to teach my school class all about sewers and what it would take to clean them. But even with my knowledge, a magical wizard from space, a cute bandit and a famous television star, it was hard work. After three days, we’d only finished a quarter of the city. Wouldn’t it have just been easier to hire drainage contractors around Melbourne to do the work for us?

We started cleaning sewers in Essendon, but it quickly became apparent that our quarry, Evil Space Wizard, was moving throughout Melbourne. If we were going to defeat him, we’d need to clean the entire city of Melbourne. According to regular Space Wizard, his evil clone wouldn’t be able to live without a filthy sewer to retreat to. When we heard about a pressing need for people cleaning blocked drains near Northcote, we figured Evil Space Wizard had to be there.

We were wrong. It started with a shake of the earth as we got to work, finishing the sewers in Dandenong. Dust fell from the top of the sewer. Then a light appeared at the other end of the tunnel, quickly approaching us. Red beams, lasers, shooting in our direction. Evil Space Wizard had come to destroy us.

Thankfully, regular Space Wizard gave us protective shields that could block laser vision, because they were made out of brass, his one weakness. Bandit threw a grenade of brass as Evil Space Wizard flew past. It didn’t shatter as we’d expected, taking him out. Instead, Evil Space Wizard grabbed the brass grenade and threw it back. It hit Bandit in the shoulder, and he fell to the ground screaming.

“Bandit, no!” I yelled, rushing over to him. I looked up at Evil Space Wizard, who was already flying away. “You’ll pay for this!” 

Why hadn’t our secret weapon worked? Regular Space Wizard had some explaining to do. But first, we needed to get Bandit out of the sewer and regroup.